Jens vs. the World #1
Jens and Randi went to Super Target. They had to.
“Excuse me,” Jens said to the snack counter girl at the snack counter by the entrance. “I’d like an Icee. No. I want a Rice Krispie treat, an M&M cookie, a cheese pretzel, and a brownie, extra icing, all blended together in a blender. And for the solvent, America’s favorite beverage, Coca-Cola.”
“We have Pepsi,” said the snack counter girl.
“Disgusting! Just give me an Icee.”
To the helpful-seeming clerk, Jens said, “Excuse me. I’m looking for a cafetière à piston.”
“A what?”
“I don’t think everyone knows what that means,” said Randi.
“I’m sorry. I’m looking for a cafetière à piston kinda thing,” Jens said.
“He means a French press,” Randi said.
“Oh,” said the clerk, “they’re right over - ”
“Never mind, I found them,” Jens said. “Now, where are your shoes for straight men?”